I am sure Ben will realize who he really loves very soon – it has been clear who he should be with from the start
Who invented the fantasy suite? Some rascal, no doubt. Or perhaps someone behind the scenes at The Bachelor with a taste for French farce. The show is already such a crazy scheme that the producers must have figured: what is one more absurd gauntlet to an audience who has watched so much?
This week on The Bachelor, Ben and the final three – Caila, Lauren B and Jojo – flew to a lush spot in Jamaica and checked into a magnificent resort. Then in the course of three successive nights, Ben spent one night in the fantasy suite with each one.
You are watching: Bachelor season 20 episode 9
The Bachelor season 20 episode 8 recap: must we bring the families into this?
So it was an episode of three one-night-stands.
And then Ben chose two of the three to continue on. There went Caila, the one with the same job as Ben. So much for that.
All this will lead us to the finale, where Ben will propose to one woman. Which will lead to a Bachelor wedding, let us hope.
I am getting ahead here. But not too far.
Ben began the episode by saying that Jamaica is a great place to fall in love. Of course, Ben also said that about Las Vegas and Mexico City. Ben probably thinks a traffic jam on the Triboro Bridge is a great place to fall in love. He is just into the whole love thing. Or should I say love thang, as he might?
Night one it was Caila, night two it was Lauren, and night three it was Jojo. Of course, all three broke down and told him they were in love with him – all three said it the same way, as this thing they had wanted to bring up for a long time but were afraid to. They all had to protect themselves.
As if this round-robin situation in the Caribbean were safe.
Everyone on The Bachelor claims to be guarded. All the women say: ‘I am afraid to open up.’ It is spoken with reluctant pride. It is code for ‘I am difficult’. It is like saying: “Break through to me.” But we are all guarded. It is the human condition to be guarded. If you are not guarded, what’s wrong with you? Even someone pouring her guts out is just doing a version of guarded. The reason we enjoy falling in love is that it just means letting your guard down.
On The Bachelor, the fantasy suite episode comes along, and suddenly all the women are rushing to say “I love you”. They are done with keeping it all in. Turns out women are old-fashioned: we have to believe there is love before we … enter the fantasy suite. Well, some of us do, anyway.
In past seasons, it has not mattered what anyone says, because they are all just emotional wrecks, and they will say anything. But Ben did something different. He responded! He told both Lauren and Jojo that he loved them, too.
Yes, both of them.
That never happens. You never really know what is going on in the main person’s head until it’s all over. But Ben … What can I say? He is just this way. He is a sower of disorder. He does not know how to make situations better. He does not have the right words at the right time.
He might in a few years.
But he is young. And he is convinced that he is in love with two women.
Ben has been in love with Lauren from the start. He has had a thing about her that is without logic. What is love but that? It could be that he likes her looks, and why not? Lauren is a leggy blonde, and there were a bunch of those, but like Barbie with all her costumes and careers, Lauren is very versatile: she looks great elegant or grungy; she looks like she has staying power. For whatever reason, Ben has had a thing for Lauren since when she was still Lauren B and it was hard to keep track of who was who. Lauren keeps saying: “Ben is my person.” She has a point.
Jojo is much more interesting, which Ben knows, but he is not in deep with Jojo the way he is with Lauren. She is who he would like to love. It would not be better for him, because Jojo seems troubled. But Ben, to his credit, would like to be more substantial than he is. Yes, it is amazing to see, and all of us complicated people have caught glimpses of it often: the world is full of people who would like to do better, who would like to have deeper conversations and ask more questions, and give life a bigger shot. But they get over it. It is too difficult.
Yes, the world is full of people who for a moment think about having a more exciting life, and then realize that they would much rather be married to someone easy and not think about it – not think about anything at all, really.